World Mental Health Day

You know what? I almost forgot it was World Mental Health Day today, so to all my fellow sufferers, yay for us and when people all ask questions and are sympathetic for one whole day. Cynicism aside, if you don’t suffer from a mental illness but are looking at different things to read up on and use what you learn, good on you.

Remembering it was WMHD instantly reminded me that a long time ago – ten years ago to be exact – I had written something for the occasion. Now, I can’t really remember what spurred me to write this stream-of-conscious piece, I think I was having a mental health ‘moment’ around this time and there were people in my life exacerbating it who also didn’t take it seriously.

Anyway I thought I’d post it below for you. To me it’s cringey (I always think that about everything I write) but it’s interesting to see for myself as well as the outside world, what has changed and what hasn’t. Oh, little, tired, young Lucy…

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…And the Whole World Smiles with You

I remember the day I saw this picture.

It was a few years ago, around 2017/18. I was scrolling through Pinterest searching posts about Asperger’s in women when I stopped at this picture of a young girl smiling.

That smile… It was like looking at the younger version of me. The top lip curled inwards, the bared teeth, the little areas of tension in the lower half of the face while the rest is relaxed, what others might call ’emotionless’.

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Hey everyone stopping by, just wanted to give a quick notice to say I’m having ~technical issues so the post I was going to put up will be up tomorrow, possibly Friday!

Reasons to Stop Sleeping On BARRY and Start Watching

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Hey guys! This post is in collaboration with She Does Stuff!

 

 

Watch Barry.
Let me say that again: Watch the HBO show BARRY.

 

We doubt you just went ahead and did that, so let us put it this way. Barry is about Barry Berkman, a former marine-turned-assassin that stumbles into an LA acting class after following a target there and, wouldn’t ya know, the boy loves it!
If that isn’t enough to pique your interest, we got some reasons why you should watch and… sorry in advance if we get too passionate.

[This post is spoiler-free! Be careful going onto YouTube to watch videos because a lot a very spoilery but we’ve added some videos below for your curiosity]

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CoVid Check-in

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What a year, huh? We’re only halfway but I feel like I’ve lived two lifetimes since Christmas. Six months ago my dad was getting discharged from hospital and I was getting ready to look after him here!

 

In case you don’t know, I live in Australia (south-east Queensland) and we are in a weird time with COVID. We’re now getting into the colder part of our winter and different states are in different stages of lockdown, with Victoria about to go into full lockdown yet again in around 24+ hours. In New South Wales (the state between QLD and Vic) it’s, for the most part, the close to ‘back to normal’ but still with restrictions (as of writing 8 new cases emerged overnight) and here in QLD we’re coming up to phase 3 of restrictions (with no new cases). I should add that it’s easier to travel into NSW with its active cases than into QLD and since I live near the border, that’s the main difference I’ve found firsthand.

While this does ease a lot of the anxiety with going out in public it still makes me hesitant, and I’m not alone. Our conservative government here has been pressuring all states and territories here to open and get back to work and school for months now. even with evidence that the lump payment people got from Centrelink (if they were ‘eligible’)  our absolute scab of a prime minister has voiced that people don’t want to go back to work because they’re getting money from the government. I should let you know that this government just did this too.
I say this because since the initial outbreak here, we’ve had weird, pseudo, contradictory rules here that have constantly made people confused. Between the phrase “social distancing” and being able to do one thing then the PM confirming it yet letting people -himself included- go to Hillsong conferences. Not one mask there, of course.
These contradictions and an Australian philosophy of “she be right, mate” [x]made a lot of people, especially in the autumn-but-still-summery-climate take a very relaxed attitude. This is a city where even McDonald’s has to remind patrons “no shirt, no thongs/shoes, no service” if they come rolling in from the beach. Honestly, the second – the SECOND – we went from the full phase one restriction and went into phase three, two of my neighbours had parties again, I had people wanting to come over, knowing very well I’m immunocompromised, in public no one was using hand sanitiser going into grocery stores or cleaning their carts. For a lot of people, it was already back to normal!

I don’t have to tell you that it wasn’t for me. Look, during this outbreak I’ve been very lucky. I don’t have a job but I do get a government payment so I can’t survive. I’m very much a homebody and a lot of the things I’m trying to achieve are through doing work here at home. This change to being ‘housebound’ didn’t change my day-to-day living. However, I wasn’t eligible for grocery delivery, I still had to get meds (thankfully our chemists here had strict protocols for stepping foot inside). I still had to go out with people who found all of it really annoying and convenient. For me, it was incredibly stressful and the idea that people found it disrupting to get their 10 packs of toilet paper or to get coffee and drinks with their mates was so. goddamn. infuriating.

As I said above, we’re officially in winter now and August is our coldest month. With phase three in effect in a few days and borders starting to open (except Vic) it’s a nervous time for a lot of people, including me. The pressure for things to be normal again and a relaxed/careless atmosphere almost guarantees a second wave.
I can’t begin to imagine how you guys in the US are doing, for you guys doing the right thing I commend you so much. You have all my support and thoughts.

For now my life is still the same and I’m hoping online acting classes will start up again soon so I can do that. My family and I (along with some of my friends) are all moving to different places in the next few months so this is going to be an interesting rest of the year that’s for sure!

Sorry if you didn’t want to read a half-political, half-rant post, however, you can’t separate COVID and politics as what we can and can’t do is dictated by the leader/party of your country.

 

 

We’re also in a recession and while you might get an image of the 2008 financial crisis, with a pandemic happening we’re not really seeing the physical (or financial effects) of it yet. Actually, I think most Australians have forgotten we’re in one – I almost did right now.

 

 

Things I Would Tell My Teenage Self

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Freshly-turned 17 me.

 

It’s a question everyone has pondered or been asked at some point; if you could go back, what would you tell your teenage self? A lot of people think asking this question doesn’t help because what’s done is done; you can’t change the past and regret can hurt and waste your present. Other people think it’s good to recognise how far you’ve come and if you’re holding onto the way you used to be.

While I think both are right, I do believe looking back not only shows how much you changed and gives pause to reflection but in a public setting like I’m typing to you know let’s others (especially younger people) think about the person they are now. Sometimes looking back also gives us a chance (or on the path) to make peace with the person and decisions we made and cut ourselves some slack now in the present.
Here are some of the points I wish I could tell myself when I was younger, followed some things I’d tell my younger self I’m doing right.

 

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Black Lives Matter and the Trauma of Police Brutality and Protesting (and me just getting it all out)

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John Boyega at Black Lives Matter protests in London. Photo by Justin Setterfield.

 

The last year of watching the news has been a new sort of serious struggle, from the Hong Kong protests last year, the fires here in Aus, COVID, and now the rightful protesting against police brutality against black people.
I was going to infodump/rant/express everything all in one post but I feel like talking about one thing right now is best.

 

More than ever before, I’ve been thinking about the trauma people of colour, especially black people, endure at the hands of authority figures, namely police officers; the people who are supposed to protect and serve the community they reside in. I mean, what I’m saying here isn’t anything new, it’s well established in black communities not just in the US, but here too in Australia and countless other countries where native people have been invaded, abused, sold, paraded as jokes, animals/barbarians while their cultures have been used as accessories. The historical equivalent of ‘chewed up and spat out’.

Continue reading “Black Lives Matter and the Trauma of Police Brutality and Protesting (and me just getting it all out)”

Hey all!

Just wanted to let you know I’ve added more tags to the Autism Acceptance Month posts so it’s easier to find particular things, e.g. stimming, ableism, etc.
Also made a Facebook page! I know, Facebook is terrible and full of garbage advise and misinformation but I thought plenty of people still use it and if I could spread some news, pieces, anything that is at least one of the more reliable blogs to go to.
I’m also going to make a Tumblr because there’s still some great chronic illness and autistic content on there (and look, man, there’s some good, spicy memes), but I’m debating between making a spankin’ new account vs making a secondary account from one I have on there.

Anyway I hope you’re staying safe and finding something that keeps you sane!

30 Days of Autism Acceptance 2020: Day 28-30!

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April 28 doesn’t apply to me so I’m skipping it

 

April 29

This question seems pretty obvious, but to answer:

Acceptance is important because everyone wants acceptance for who they are. I do, you do, everyone. Acceptance means one is fine the way they are and making peace with it.
If I’ve made peace with who I am, others should be willing to accept that, and when other people accept that, it means we’ve achieved understanding and respect.

 

April 30

The month of Acceptance might be over, and it might have been glossed over this year because of other circumstances happening right now, but awareness of what autism is for individuals and the community as well as the acceptance within ourselves and the community is more important than ever.

You are not alone.

There is nothing wrong with you.

Take a deep breath and hyper-fixate for a bit. Play with a hair tie. Eat a slice of cheese. You’re doing great.

 

 

Thank you so much for staying with me through Autism Acceptance Month! I will be away for a few days as I tend to other things and should be back soon talking about something! Or nothing.. who knows?